Close croc encounters.

For scenery, animals and adventures - Queensland's got it all, so pack your belongings in a rucksack for a whistle-stop tour of North East Australia Beautiful One Day - Perfect the Next' may not be quite as forthright an advertising blurb as the 'So Where The Bl**dy Hell Are You?' slogan famously chosen by Tourism Australia, but it's still a confident statement. It very accurately describes the Great Barrier Reef state, and is therefore an appropriate phrase selected by Queenslanders who certainly treated me to nine days of whirlwind action and adventure. Aussies are not normally prone to hyperbole but they do like to shout to the rooftops when they have something to be proud of. Our journey, billed as a tour of Eccentric Queensland, took in bush walking, rainforest trekking, pumpabiking (a sort of human-powered hydrofoil), reef snorkelling, wining, dining and stand-up paddle surfing, among other activities. We began in Cairns, gateway to the Great Barrier Reef in the far north of the state. A short walk from our hotel led us to the town's reef fleet terminal and a full-day catamaran cruise to Michaelmas Cay. We enjoyed a lazy afternoon snorkelling in the turquoise blue sea surrounding the tiny coral island and then took a seat on a semi-submersible vessel which provided stunning views of the reef, not to mention the giant sea turtles. Throw in a tasty buffet lunch on board and, at a total cost of dhs257, that's bonza value. Speaking of bonza, a 'swaggie' - an original Aussie bushman - awaited us later that evening at Cairns Night Zoo for some billy tea and damper. Torches were at the ready as the swaggie led the way for a nocturnal view of some native critters. We got to pat the wide-awake koalas, fed hungry kangaroos around a campfire and got up close, but not too close, and personal with venomous spiders, snakes and crocodiles. Our light-hearted fun evening had begun with a traditional barbecue and culminated with a practical lesson in bush dances like the Heel and Toe Polka. Even my two left feet could cope with the moves. After the 'bush-lite' of the zoo the next stop on the itinerary early the next morning was the real thing. Dean, or Deano as we came to know him, was our guide for a two-day rainforest and rock art 4WD safari. We headed for an outback camp at Jowalbinna, Aboriginal for Dingo's Ear, in the Quinkan region where earlier in the year Deano was stranded by flash floods for three weeks. If that wasn't grim enough, he was also bitten by a venomous spider and, alone in the wild without communications to the outside world, toughed the pain out in his one-man tent. Deano also regaled us with such tales as crocodiles dining on an idiot armed with a camcorder and a supply of meat bait on his boat. He even stopped the vehicle at one point excitedly for a photo opportunity of a non-venomous snake. But he reckoned crocodiles were harmless - as long as you resist the urge to poke your nose in their river or creek habitat. "Nature generally leaves you alone if you treat it right," he said, "but always keep on your guard." The torches were out again shortly after our arrival at our outback lodge accommodation. They were handy for avoiding the snakes when making your way to the loos in the pitch black. A chorus of kookaburras, butcher birds and blue-faced honeyeaters awoke us ahead of our trip to see one of the world's top rock art areas. Quinkan's Aboriginal occupation dates back more than 30,000 years with startling images of spirits, animals and human figures adorning its sandstone shelters. This historical gem was only discovered as recently as the 1960s when road workers found it by chance. It's a humbling experience and proved the highlight of our visit with our hosts, the Wilderness Challenge. The family business, set up in 1990 by Tom Warnes who spotted a gap in the market, offers a variety of trips ranging up to a 14-day safari to the northern tip of the state. Going off Deano's ecological and geographical knowledge, the company's expert guides play a key role in making the Wilderness Challenge a must-do. After 'slumming it' in the outback we headed back into the rainforest for a luxury night's stay at Voyages Silky Oaks Lodge at the foot of the Mossman River Gorge, popular with honeymooning couples. It's a beautiful resort but I fell into a panic when it dawned on me there was no telly in the room. However, I grudgingly conceded that catching Neighbours may not be top of the activity list for newlyweds. Next on our whistle-stop tour was a trip south to the trendy coastal resort of Noosa but not before popping into Australia Zoo - home of the late, great Crocodile Hunter, Steve Irwin. Irwin and his wife Terri took over management of the zoo in Beerwah in 1992 and today it resembles something of a shrine to the naturalist and TV personality who was fatally pierced by a stingray barb two years ago. The show he devoted his life to still goes on, with the highlight being the twice-daily crocodile show at the delightfully named Crocoseum auditorium. Plans are afoot to expand it into a World Zoo and similar global domination plans are in the pipeline for Irwin's daughter, Bindi. The 11-year-old is a one-girl industry who already has her own line of clothing. Next it was on to the Sunshine Coast, where the sophisticated set go for their hols in Noosa. There is an American East Coast vibe to the place. Queensland has its fair share of high-rise blocks so it's refreshing that Noosa builds outwards from the sea with a four-storey height limit in place. A large slice of Noosa is protected land or waterways so it's popular with nature lovers. The river that runs through the resort was our destination for an early morning bash at the newly created sport of stand up paddle surfing (www.standuppaddlesurf.com.au). I started out by falling straight into the water, but soon got the hang of balancing by using the paddles. For those fancying a more sedate pursuit, the best bet might be the camel safari (www.camelcompany.com.au) on Noosa's North Shore. All too soon it was goodbye Noosa and 'g'day' to Fraser Island - the largest sand island in the world. Fraser Island, a 75-mile Beach of the World Heritage site, is a truly wondrous place which is home to a sprawling rainforest, more than 100 beautiful freshwater lakes and even a shipwreck. We spent the night at the island's four-star Kingfisher Bay resort where we had several glasses of Cabernet Sauvignon as the stunning sunset view sweetened our palates. Last stop was Brisbane, the state capital, but I confess that even I was flagging by this point. Even though Brisbane is not up there with Sydney or Melbourne for tourist attractions, it has plenty to offer and is very much on the upward curve. It has its own bridge climb to rival Sydney Harbour and the recently opened Gallery of Modern Art has already attracted exclusive exhibitions of Warhol and Picasso to the city. You can even explore the city by going pumpabiking down the Brisbane River. Basically, it's an aquatic pogo with the promise of a free ride 'if your pants stay dry'. Is Queensland really 'Beautiful One Day - Perfect the Next'? Mate, it's a cracker.

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